Willow

When I came to you, willow tree
that last clear summer’s evening,
when I told you that I loved you,
you whispered secrets to me
of the many things you’d seen.
 
Oh willow! Standing there so long,
great limbs outstretched
as if to reach infinity-sky.
The caress of your rough bark to me
felt as good as making love, almost.
 
So long you have grown by
the path by the water meadows
Where often I have gone to think.
And at your feet lies a stream
whose sweet depths I would stare.
 
Still waters run deep!
For you carry my soul with you
flowing and gone, yet forever here.
The great roots of my willow tree
replenish themselves in you.
 
Yet as I hug my willow’s trunk
coarse voices sound from down the path.
With an overwhelming sense of fear
I flee from their approach, casting
but a quick goodbye.
 
With haste I go, and wonder why
such loathing I should feel for men.
Is it my willow urging me to run,
such as he would do, but cannot?
His spirit is within me now.


August 1986

Lament

What end do life’s errands run
What guides my feet upon what way?
Wither do great friends go when
Darkness comes between & paths divide?

What makes the keening of great friendship
Is peril & fear the only true way?
When other can the quality of life
Shine through this dull monotony.

True Souls! Where are you in this world
keen heart! So will I ever know you?
No pang of bitterness nor pain, or of
Joyfulness is there in all my days.

Where now the warrior, arms shining bright,
Where so, Aragorn, Eomer or Elrond?
Where is the man, true of purpose
Deep meaning to his every move?

Why in the end is there no wonder,
No high purpose by which to live?
All such seems gone now from us,
Gone, all gone, with the passing of the years.


December 1986

Freedom Bound

Freedom Bound
Today my heart is freedom bound
Yesterday’s darkness is gone, but not forgotten.
No! Never to forget such pain.

Today I laugh
Yesterday I wept as if forever.
So now I sing and give thanks for the weeping.
For the Understanding it has given.

My sorrow-joy
Is all one in the keening of life.
I walk the path forever alone, yet chance to meet
other travelers upon this dusty road.

God’s all pervading
Love is within; the Wonder of Life
is all about. I share it here and there,
But feel it strongest when on my own.

I look out
Under vast open skies, walk down into
Valleys steeped in adumbral silence. I climb
Rocks by a stream, intent on Oneness.

And when laughter calls,
Beckons of my attention,
I go with joy, glancing back to the hills. I will always
return there, for my Soul is Freedom Bound.


July 1981

Spatial Deeps

Each person’s Soul shines, shines
brightly, like a star
And there are countless millions in the sky.
It should make this world so bright, clear, yet
Between each lies vast chasms like
Unplumbed depths of night.
Oblivious of warmth, comfort,
Who knows how to bridge this gap?

Ride, riding hurled and dazed upon Intergalactic
Winds, sweeping the Cosmos
Moving from point to point, light to light,
Trying, try to fill the gap
If only briefly, moving on,
On, even if you want to,
Need to, stay; feeling close to one
Whose Soul sings sweetly, sweetly.

If you try to anchor, stop or stem the tide
To stay by one such star,
Still at your nearest point there
Would be, remain, this chasm.
So move, keep moving and your life
Becomes like points on a curve
Each, every one a blazing encounter,
Vibrant in brief glory.

And when the pendulum swings, taking you
Inexorably away, leaving
Your Soul crying out for the loss; when
You see disappearing, receding, the arms of your
Lover, calling, and you
Wonder if, if ever you will come
So close again, so near
Know then, that this is the true Way.

When you leave your friends and all
That their companionship means,
Walking in the night, feel this fear of the immeasurable
Timeless void; saturated in Spiritual strengths
Loneliness tinged with God’s all
Pervading Smile; Angels dancing, dancing,
Always out of reach and sight
Yet ever, ever there.

Neverending loneliness, warmth, coldness, spiritual
Comfort in the Omniscient Void
A smile tinged with a tear, looking forwards, backwards,
Enjoying a Soul’s brief sharing; now here, now gone;
Here, gone; torn away from your
Grasp by the relentless flow of
The World-Stream; life passing before you
Like swift moving film.

So when the starlight blossoms, scented, on
Wild East winds; as the echoes of
friend’s laughter die, die in your ears,
When softly, sadly, slowly comes the silence
Buzzing loud at you, look:
Stare at it, breath it, be it, love it.
Be afraid and rejoice, rejoice; for this is IT, the Tao.
There is nothing more.


November 1987

Wild Night

In the wilds of a violent night
When keen winds draw my mind away
And the stars scream at me, strongly
From my bedside I smell Africa!

In the desolation of my Soul
From the haunted streets and pavements
As polluted rain falls on me, tainting
I remember my far-seeing eye.

By a lamp in the dark
At a desk, with pencil scrawling
I try to find my sanity and
Throw doors open wide!

From a rift within my forehead
I can feel the power pushing
Erupting out and reaching up to know
That dark, wild, scented solitude.

Awake from slumber, my Spirit
Flees; my Soul sucks in eternal breath
And spirals outwards, tumbling
To be welcomed home again.

The voices roaring in my ears
Of celestial music trumpeting my return
Cosmic shaking of old friend’s hands
Who urge me on towards the Master.

Leaping up long winding steps
Each tread, a distant galaxy
Accompanied by shooting stars
The spatial Hymn throbs louder

So on again and on again
Followed by the hosts of light
The Lord’s servants running on ahead
They lead my up towards the Hall.

And now the entrance to the Throne,
Strange, yet familiar to us all
The Golden King beyond it dwells
Yet t’is my own home street –
– my own front door.


September 1985

Release

Today, under a clear harvest sky
Where late afternoon Sun turned high
clouds into gold
At Figsbury Ring I looked to God
And gave to Him a love that had
Burned so deep inside.

I looked out over clear, warm, lands
Sucked in the vastness of the sky
And cried for you;
My Soul rejoiced life’s bitter-sweetness,
The keening stir of sadness at losing that
Which I had never had.

Through flames to ashes and dust I released
My hopes and fears to His safekeeping,
To do with as He would;
For the ways of the World are wide,
And many paths and errands come and go;
Who knows what the future brings?

With illusions gone and vision cleared
I walk, once again, the Sunlit Path
Eternally alone;
Yet life is fullness and swings in balance,
My ear in tune with the Cosmic Heartbeat
I pick for you a flower.

So time will pass on from this day,
And the path will lead to strange new lands
Afar from home;
But always, waiting, deep within my heart
Will be a chance to find a track that leads me
Back, to Figsbury Ring.

September 1986

Destiny

Destiny calls me
I hear her voice,
Softly whispering
In endless caress.

Into those gaps that occur
In daily life,
Those moments when activity lulls
Into silence
And the whole world stands listening –
Then I hear her alluring song:
Come, come!

The wilds are drawing me
Into their deadly arms,
From whose crooning lullaby I
May never reawaken.
Oblivion and wild sunsets
Haunt me,
Following silently wherever I go.

I turn about, quickly
As if to find revealed
This fallen Angel taunting me;
But She is never there.
I hide in shadows, watch
To see who may pass me by –
It is never Her.

Such wild hammering I feel
Within my heart!
I strain to catch Her immortal song,
Blown on etherial winds.
I implore: let me come to you!
Let me sit at your feet, though
Your indifference makes of me
Your slave.

I would follow you for eternity
Just to catch your fleeting smile
It would sustain me for another aeon
Until again you chance
To look my way.

Thou art my destiny:
I hear thee call my name.

1992

Continental Drift

My left foot is numb
My right arm disconnected
Little of my brain functions any more
Perhaps it never did.

Can I still write? Can I still think
And feel?
Is there rebirth and a new awakening again,
After awakening again, after again…

So many times I have
Fallen asleep
Sleep-walked thru most of my life.
I feel the need for Blood to stir, I shake the chains
That shackle me. Impotent…

Only in the deepest recess of my
Mind do I find a hint of Freedom
Like a chink in the clouds, a brief ray of sun,
Shut out again. Gone.
So long I have walked under the storm clouds
That I have forgotten to even
Dream of day.

But as the chains bring me crashing to my knees
I feel the stirring of blood.
The wind bites cold and desolate in my Soul
Yet burning true and keen.

Simple comforts of life: warmth, food, friendship,
Peace of Mind.
Such things do not frequent this Poet’s Soul.
I had forgotten that I was such,
A Poet.

A shaper of words and imaginings
A Painter
Of lost inner worlds without.
A dreamer of unknown meanings
And continental drift.

An Eye that can see the World
Though the World sees not
The Eye.

2006